Cher and Cher-a like?

This young lad has got nothing in common with Cher, apart from having smooth skin like a baby's bottom. I hear the pre-historic 'botox' lass is coming out with another 'Greatest Hits' album some time soon, if by any chance, you're a fan or something.

Anyway, the story of the day is about a young Brazilian Jean Carlos Chera, 9 years old who is making waves in the football world. Not only has he got smooth skins but apparently smooth 'dribbling' as well, so smooth that it's enough to make poachers from clubs like Manchester United salivating to have the prospect of this young prodigy in their club. Quoting the website: "Jean is seen scoring goals from midfield, dribbling past several defenders and playing among 13- and 14-year-olds."

Looks like we've got a new football sensation, this should be able to excite the football fans of Brazil. Don't worry, Argentinian supporters, we've got Cher! :D

Thor inspired robbers

57 year old is the latest victim in a recent spate of crimes involving robbers who use hammer-like weapons. Five such cases have been reported in a single for full story Posted by Hello

Where else if not in JB.By the way, "anyone" we know from JB??I bet "Celaka-land" is not as notorious...hi!hi!"Kasi semua, kalau tidak gua ketuk sama lu"!

Kick racism out of Football

France and Arsenal striker Thierry Henry launched a campaign to stamp out racism in Football.Others joining him:World Player of the Year Ronaldinho of Barcelona, Inter Milan's Adriano, Chelsea's Claude Makelele,Real Madrid's Roberto Carlos and Manchester United's Ruud van Nistelrooy.

she will be loved...

Originally uploaded by ellf.
Many of us feel a little silly if we react strongly to the death of a pet or the plight of an animal. "Well, it was just a dog," we say, embarrassed by our grief. Where does this attitude come from? It’s certainly not biblical. Our modern view of animals can be traced primarily to such Enlightenment philosophers as René Descartes, who argued that animals are biological machines unable to feel pain or experience emotion and unimportant except as they affect the lives of human beings. In the Bible, by contrast, value and redemption extend not only to humans but to all animals.

'The wolf shall live with the lamb, the leopard shall lie down with the kid, the calf and the lion and the fatling together, and a little child shall lead them. The cow and the bear shall graze, their young lie down together; and the lion shall eat straw like the ox. The nursing child shall play over the hole of the asp, and the weaned child shall put its hand in the adder’s den. They will not hurt or destroy on all my holy mountain; for the earth will be full of the knowledge of the Lord as the waters cover the sea.'

The commentaries on these texts almost exclusively emphasize how glorious it is to be human. They stress the hierarchy within creation. Repeatedly they remind humans that only they are created in God’s image, that only they have been given dominion and told to subdue the earth, that only they are directly addressed by God, and that only they have speech and the right to name all other creatures. But amidst all the exegetical energy bent on glorifying humanity, a pivotal theological teaching is neglected: that all life is sacred, and that we are to love all creatures.

Most people deny the sacredness of animal life not out of pride but because it is too painful to acknowledge. There is simply too much animal suffering, and we too often find it necessary to hurt animals. It is far easier simply to turn away from the problem. Consequently, we seldom talk about or even allow ourselves to be conscious of our conflicted feelings. We live with animals, name, feed and play with them and value their companionship. We wonder at their beauty and grieve when they die. And we also eat, wear and experiment on them.

Don't hate me coz' I'm happy and gay!!!

I swear I didnt know they were gay too... or maybe I was just watchin' them through the eyes of a child. Cartoons were cartoons in our days. They we're dimensional characters created to entertain us kids... and entertaintment is what we got!! I guess we can force associations any way we want but it's still at the end of the day... a matter of choice. here a list of the woulda' been- coulda' been:

By Tim Mitts

This guy's kinda borderline. Not the "gay" part: he's datin' a cross-dressin' pipe cleaner an hangin' with a guy named "Wimpy". The "sexy" part. Sure, he's got the forearms an' that macho accent, but he's also kinda dumb an' probably tastes like spinach. Maybe worth a one-night stand.

We know he's gay cause he'd rather hang with the dog than the chicks, but what makes him sexy? Y'ever have a boyfriend so totally fucked up that just tryin' to keep them from destroyin' themselves was an aerobic workout? An' the worse they got, the harder you fell for 'em? That's Shag.

Hefty Smurf.
Oh sure, 101 Smurfs in the entire village and one Smurfette (who nobody ever pays attention to, anyway). Don't ask me how they reproduced. Fruitier'n blueberries, the lot of 'em... but Hefty's the one who's got the whole village worshippin' his biceps. "Hefty." I guess "Beefy" an' "Studly" were too obvious.

I don't care what anyone says, this guy is a great partner. Without him, Bert would have his head so far up his plush ass that he'd look like a balled-up pair of socks. Ernie keeps him relaxed, reminds him to have fun. He's my role model.

When they were outin' Batman an' Robin, how did they miss this guy? It's so bloody obvious! But Jughead is the ultimate gay romantic, even better'n Ernie. Instead of tryin' to lead Archie into the li'l boys' room, he keeps givin' Archie good advice on how not to shit up his love life any worse than he already has. Why doesn't Jughead kick the girls-- the ones he hates so much-- outta Archie's life altogether? Cause it's about Archie an' what he wants. That's sick... but that's love.

Bugs Bunny.
Was there ever any doubt? Bugs could seduce the Pope and make him like it! Unlike most cartoon characters with their cookie-cutter "girlfriends" an' suspicious-lookin' "nephews", Bugs never even pretended to be straight. An' every time he kisses Elmer Fudd or Yosemite Sam an' neutralizes 'em completely, the message is clear. In a world of repressive heterosexuality (like, y'know, the fifties, when the cartoons were made), being openly gay is power.

You don't get any sexier than that.

Honorable Mentions: Batman and Yogi Bear. One's got the world's greatest set of abs an' the other's got the charm of Casanova, but in the end, both of 'em are disgustin' pedophiles like Falwell, and all three of 'em should be sealed in their respective caves for as long as there are children in the world. Robin's short-shorts. Boo-Boo's nickname. Hell, Robin's nickname was "Dick." Sick, sick, sick.

Lunch time Musings

I can't get the "twisted nerve"whistling tune from Kill Bill out of my head all morning. Maybe this is old news for some but typed kill bill in google and found THIS SITE (caution:Seram dan Ganas) . Am pretty sure the people from Linux & Apple funded this..hi!hi! Turn on the sound for better action. Chris, pls bring both KillBill vol1 & 2 to Malacca as I crave to see our Uma kick ass again. Anyway it's good to know that we seem to have real concern about the environment and to make us more credible, any officials not practising what they preach should be sacked like Rodney "toon-army/tsunami" Marsh.I found out that I am a very demanding person this morning, at least according to Dr Sleep . You see, I fall under the "hang glider" category when I sleep. Anyway, I do not promote violence and am not demanding,... please do not watch Kill Bill(reverse psychology) but get the soundtrack instead, then you'd have "twisted nerve" playing in your head too. Outie!...makan time!

Metrosexual Spongebob Squarepants

The toon character Spongebob Squarepants has come under fire by certain Christian group in the US. Link
Seriously, in a time when most men are trying to look & dress like David Beckham & Ryan Seacrest all in the name of this new term called "Metrosexual", which means I look gay but am not gay, ..why can't Spongebob be merely metrosexual too. If all these REAL men can sport the sunglasses worn like hairband,body hugging shirt and eyebrows well shaped & eye lashes "melenting"...can't spongebob be that too? No one accused bugs bunny of anything, he's a cross dresser...don't believe me ? Click here
In my own opinion, the most "flamboyant" cartoon character is Huckleberry Hound...remember? That suit and that "Oh my darlin" tune. It's sad that we are at a time when the word "gay" does not mean happy and almost everyone thinks all foreign workers from India & Bangladesh are gay cause they hold hands... which is not entirely true. In a nut shell, let the kids just enjoy their cartoon like how we enjoyed our Thundercats & Transformers (Ducktales for Suresh) ..... stop labeling it!

What A Babe!

Congratulations to Terence and Gwen, proud parents of a new born healthy baby girl by the name of Marissa Scully.

We are truly honoured to be Marissa's Godparents. Here are some pics which we took last night at Pantai. Click here

Let's go to the Zoo, there's lots of things to do...

Our Singapore trip started with a KTM night train ride from KLSentral, the ride was not entirely smooth, but it was quite ok. I slept through the journey safe for the occassional 'shakes' that felt like the train was going to de-rail. Other than that, I think the train ride was cool. It was kind of like a mild roller coaster. My wife couldn't sleep because it was moving too much and a little too noisy. Vodka could help!

Anyway, we left at 10.45pm on KTM's Senandung Malam and ended up in front of Daphne & Arul's doorsteps at about 9.30 in the morning. We planned to go to Sentosa but after a little discussion, we scrapped the idea and opted for the Singapore Zoo instead. It has been ages since we were last in a zoo. Anyway, the zoo in Melaka is not entirely a sight to see, the animals there are slightly unhappy compared to the ones we see here. Furthermore, the Singapore is hailed as one of the best Zoo in Asia Pacific.


After a day of leisure, we went to the zoo on the very next day and we had a fabulous time. We were greeted by this 'mohiccan' sitting on the branches of the trees nearby. The animals were not kept in a pathetic cages (accept for the poisonous snakes, which was a damn good idea!) but were allowed to roam free in their close-to natural habitat provided by the zoo. We were only separated by a large 'longkang' from the carnivorous animals, I guess they did this for our safety (really? You think? Duh!) so that our brothers and sisters from the animal kingdom won't mistake us for lunch. I'm quite surprised they had a polar bear there. The Siberian White Tigers are a sight for sore eyes, they are really majestic and royally robed in their striped white fur. I was flabbbergasted that we were less than 30 feet from the large cat. I think if it wanted to or hungry enough, it could potentially jump across. What's amazing is that the animals there looked quite happy and fat compared to the ones that we see back in our zoo here. We even saw quite a happy and 'excited' fella 'hanging' around in the zoo. :D

Click here for more pictures.

After that, we went for a scrumptious meal in Hard Rock Cafe Singapore which served us a gargantuan proportion of a meal which Arul could not finish. After that, our friend felt dizzy and 'muak' with the oversized meal. Poor fella! We felt kind of bad for dragging him all the way to town to satisfy our taste bud for pork ribs. The chocolate brownie was humongus! We almost ordered two but Daphne was really smart in asking the golden question: How big is it? The food server says that it can serve four but 'sometimes' two person can finish it (???). We almost fell off the chair when the desert finally arrived.

After that we went back to D & A's home feeling extremely bloated. It was really good catching up after such a long time. Arul & I have been friends since as far back as I could remember. If I said it once, I said it a hundred times, 'good friends are indeed hard to come by'. Both Daphne and Arul are a gem of a couple, we think that you will be great parents. Thanks!

Daphne & Arul, we had a terrific weekend in Singapore. Thanks to the both of you for your warmth and hospitality. You made us feel really welcomed. Please come and visit us and allow the opportunity to host you at our place. :D


Many thanks!

chris n cath

Cheers to "Celaka-Land" - mj

Aiseh man, orang “Celaka-land” (aka Malaka) kena teruk dari politikus politikus mereka yang tak ada kerja dan komen sense.
Nampak nya mereka pandai “talk cock”. Memang ni tidak hairan, after all, tahun ni Year of the Rooster atau “Cocke-real”
Pengerusi Jawatankuasa Hal Ehwal Wanita dan Kebajikan Negeri, Datuk Ramlah Abbas berpendapat ``Golongan tua (ia itu, orang yang berumur 35 tahun ke atas) pula sebenarnya mempunyai asas budaya yang kukuh.”
Budaya yang kukuh? Ini memang “krap”! Apa yang kita lihat selalu ia lah budaya krony and korupsi…kepimpinan dulu amat famous tuk “rock and on the roll and rogol”!
Baca lah laporan Malaysiakini tentang skandel yang baru di Celaka-land:
The Malacca state government included Chief Minister Mohd Ali Rustam’s three school-going children and his wife as ‘official delegates’ in a RM1 million working visit to the United States in Jan this year.
The names of his wife, two sons and daughter have been found to be listed among the 23 official delegates who toured the United States. The 15-day working visit commenced on Jan 4.
Other members of the delegation, headed by Malacca governor Khalil Yaakob, include the chief minister, state secretary Ahmad Rusli Joharie, executive councillor Poh Ah Tiam and their wives.
Throughout their two weeks in the US and Dubai, the 23 delegates were arranged to stay in posh hotels like Hilton Hawaii Village Beach and Spa, as well as Hotel Le Royal Meridien Beach Resort and Spa. The cost for the two-week trip was estimated at RM60,000 per person.
Lim Guan Eng questioned why two state exco members in charge of tourism were excluded from the visit if the trip was related to the tourism industry in the state.
Malacca tourism and culture committee chairperson Amid Nordin and his deputy Chua Peng Siong were not included in the working visit. (Nampak nya CM berpendapat Amid should stay at home dan sesuai saja untuk membuat komen tentang remaja negeri dan bahasa dan budaya!)
The Malacca state government now is a ‘headless’ government, all senior officials have gone on this holiday trip,” he claimed.
For once you tak betul lah Guan Eng, it is especially “headless” when all senior officials and politicians are at home!

Cheers to all my kawan in Celaka-land


Kegemilangan Berulang Kembali.

Amboi, amboi..... siapa itu pauline yang berani metertawakan rakyat melaka,(lahabau kau)
Dimana bumi dipijak disitu langit dijunjung, gua cakap sama lu.
Marilah kita rakyat melaka bersatu dan menolak anasir-anasir ganjil yang cuba meporakperandakan negeri melaka
yang terkenal dengan buah dan batang melakanya.Tak lupa juga madras cafe yang telah menjadi nadi kepada perkembangan mental dan fizikal kita, wilson chicken rice, rashid, limbongan burger, acs mee rebus, TTB, HQ akan menjadi saksi kepada kegemilangan melaka yang berulang kembali.
Kenapa tak percaya...?

Bahasa Berbunga Melaka

As you know Pauline laughed at us and sent us this mail...what do my fellow people of Melaka ...tempat tumpah darah kita (when we fell as a kid riding bicycle) say about this attack on our "culture"? Melaka, where it all began ! I think Hang tuah started this "Celaka" thing...I say it's state heritage..hi!hi!-arul
Pauline's mail:

To the Malaka people (and affiliates), here's something that made me laugh
out loud this morning.

I remembered that I had lost count of the no. of times I've heard the
expression "Cilakak!" in conversations seemed to come out almost
sub-conciously and it seemed to be used in a "mesra" way like the dude below

Well, watch out, our moral guardians are out to get you!


Orang Melaka diminta tinggalkan ungkapan lahabau


MELAKA 18 Jan. - Budaya sebahagian masyarakat di negeri ini yang gemar
berseloroh menggunakan bahasa kasar seperti celaka dan lahabau kau wajar
ditinggalkan kerana ia sudah lapuk dan tidak melambangkan ketinggian
ketamadunan Melayu.

Walaupun penggunaan perkataan sedemikian termasuk juga hawau dan sial kau
sebagai tanda `mesra', Pengerusi Jawatankuasa Hal Ehwal Wanita dan Kebajikan
Negeri, Datuk Ramlah Abbas berpendapat, ia tidak elok ditujukan kepada orang
lain kerana membawa maksud tidak baik.

Meskipun mesej yang hendak disampaikan baik, penggunaan perkataan itu tidak
sesuai dan bertentangan dengan budaya masyarakat Melayu, tegas beliau.

``Perkataan-perkataan itu memang tidak elok. Memang tidak dapat dinafikan
dan tidak boleh dibahaskan lagi.

``Kebanyakan orang Melayu yang berumur 35 tahun ke bawah tidak pandai
menilai budaya dan adat mana yang baik dan buruk untuk dijadikan amalan

``Golongan tua pula sebenarnya mempunyai asas budaya yang kukuh, tetapi
mereka perlu disedarkan supaya menjadi contoh yang baik kepada golongan yang
lebih muda untuk lebih bersopan santun,'' katanya kepada Utusan Malaysia
hari ini.

Beliau mengulas mengenai Kempen Budi Bahasa dan Nilai-Nilai Murni yang
dilancarkan oleh Perdana Menteri, Datuk Seri Abdullah Ahmad Badawi baru-baru

Kempen itu antara lain bertujuan memupuk sifat-sifat terpuji dalam

Bagi mencapai matlamat itu, Ramlah berkata, generasi masa kini perlu diberi
suntikan nilai-nilai murni dan tatasusila bagi memelihara adat Melayu yang
semakin dilupakan itu.

Pengerusi Jawatankuasa Kebudayaan dan Pelancongan Negeri, Datuk Wira Amid
Nordin pula berkata, remaja sasaran terbaik bagi kempen itu.

Pada masa ini, katanya, kebanyakan remaja negeri ini telah hilang identiti,
budaya dan nilai-nilai murni sehingga mereka tidak tahu untuk berbahasa
dengan golongan muda, sebaya atau lebih tua.

``Kalau di negara ini, sebut saja orang Melaka, ramai yang beranggapan
rakyatnya gemar menggunakan perkataan kesat dan kasar.

``Saya tidak setuju jika perkataan maki-hamun dan mencarut itu dijadikan
amalan oleh sesiapa sahaja kerana ia tidak baik dan memang wajar ditolak,''

Amid mencadangkan setiap aktiviti sempena kempen itu perlu dijalankan di
kompleks beli-belah dan pusat tumpuan remaja bagi menarik perhatian golongan

Tongkat Ali

"Dear Ah Beng,

Hi, I am a 15 year old male who likes to have forearms like Popeye to impress girls.

I have tried all kinds of pills, exercises and protein powder but results are slow or poor.

The forearms are among the hardest muscles to train, so I want to consult you as I have seen Ah Bengs such as yourself with tatoos on bulging forearms.

Can you tell me the secret to big forearms? Thank you.

Yours truly,


Click to see koko Ah Beng reply

AFTA what?

For those of you expecting the price of foreign cars to reduce in Malaysia because of AFTA, well, it doesn't look like it's going to happen...

Just days after receiving my new Hyundai Accent, which is suppose to be one of the most affordable foreign sedan car in Malaysia, the price shoots up RM8,500. So now, the price of the car is more RM74k. Good for me cos I got at the previous price but definitely not good for the automobile market.

For those of you who reads chinese, you can click here for news on car price change http://

Anyway, here's a brief synopsis, (I didn't get the ones for Honda and Toyota, apparently it has gone up as well)

Perdana: 99k to 107k, up 7k+
Wira(A): up 2k
Wira(M): up 1.4k
Iswara(1.3): up 1-1.3K
Iswara(1.5): up 1.4k Waja(Std): up 445
Waja(X) : up 900
Gen2(stf): up 500
Gen2(X) : up 5k
Satra: NA

Matrix (A/M): up 1-1.2k (Jan 1st)
Accent(M): 62k+ to 69k+, up 7.5k
Accent(A): 65k+ to 74k+, up 8.5k
Elantra( 91k to 101k, up 10k
Sonata(2.0): 122k to 131k, up 9k+
Atoz(A): 45.2k to 45.9k, up 700
Getz(1.3): 61k+ to 66k, up 4k
Picanto: up 4-5k

We all know the type of quality that 'Protong' is giving to us. And we thought that the prices of foreign cars will become more affordable through the implementation of AFTA which was suppose to remove exorbitant tariffs. Looks like the powers-that-be will never allow that to happen. Decrease the tariffs, they have, but they have also increase the 'other' automobile tax. Very sly!

I like my beloved iswara, God knows that she has served us well. But after driving the Accent for a little less than a week now, I'll tell you, i feel that as Proton owners (ex-owner now) have been shortchanged somewhat, in terms of quality of the car and customer service, compared to foreign cars. The ride is different, the feel is sturdy and smooth, unlike the empty can that we used to drive. Don't get me wrong, I'm not writing about how good foreign cars are but how our national car should be, to be able to compare with world standards. I can't deny that it's more affordable (by making other cars not affordable, not by making it cheaper) compared to other cars but it provides you a less than mediocre quality, much less than we deserve.

And with the new price hike for foreign automobile, this makes foreign cars even more a luxury item. Notice that the quantum for the price increase for proton cars and hyundai cars as above. Ridiculous - if you ask me. Can we expect the prices of foreign cars to go down by 2008? Saya ingat tak boleh lah!

2 cents for this logo??

Originally uploaded by ellf.
hey there arul, tried out your idea for a anime logo... and this is the result. what do you think?? i kinda like it..... albeit a bit limp bizkit but hey' whatever makes them tick man. hope it sits in well with the powers that be. do let me know what you guys think. can it be tweaked further? cheers.

My toy is better than yours!

Creative boss Sim Wong Hoo sounds like one of the EPL managers, worst like one small kid telling the other kid how much better his toy is. For crying out loud, make your product good and shut up...let the consumers decide...can or not?I for one am using a creative MP3 player and find it to be functional. For those with an eye for design...iPod wins hands down.Seems he's taking this quite personally lah...
In his latest interview with ChannelNewsAsia, he said this about the new iPod shuffle:

“Actually, to me it’s a big let-down: we’re expecting a good fight but they’re coming out with something that’s five generations older. It’s our first generation MuVo One product feature, without display, just have a (shuffle feature). We had that — that’s a four-year-old product.

“So I think the whole industry will just laugh at it, because the flash people — it’s worse than the cheapest Chinese player. Even the cheap, cheap Chinese brand today has display and has FM. They don’t have this kind of thing, and they expect to come out with a fight; I think it’s a non-starter to begin with.”

Bottom line better for us...stuffs get cheaper!

WMD of a different kind indeed

Imagine if the yankees used this on the Taleban in Afghanistan...Man!Can you imagine the "havoc" in the desert.. i can imagine the Taleban Freedom Fighters swinging their turbans , wearing nothing but a smile...

Pentagon reveals rejected chemical weapons - News | Print | New Scientist: "THE Pentagon considered developing a host of non-lethal chemical weapons that would disrupt discipline and morale among enemy troops, newly declassified documents reveal.

Most bizarre among the plans was one for the development of an 'aphrodisiac' chemical weapon that would make enemy soldiers sexually irresistible to each other. Provoking widespread homosexual behaviour among troops would cause a 'distasteful but completely non-lethal' blow to morale, the proposal says."

Stop! You Are Under Arrest!

I don't know if you guys have noticed but there are sure a lot of strange things happening lately. Don't mean to be a prophet of doom, but I think the end is close at hand! I'm not talking about the Tsunami disaster nor the infamous Malaysian Blackout.

Even in this blog itself, you've seen some awfully weird stories that could practically put tears in your eyes, we've learnt that there are some who likes to detach balls and then again there are some who would like to attach them. As much as I hate to admit it, the news was indeed quite an emotional experience. I just hope that the two is not correlated somehow. I mean, we wouldn't want to hear about a desperately seeking blondie going around to yank out the balls of promiscuous males and attaching them to some giggling soft toy, do we? Come to think of it, that wouldn't be such a bad idea as a punishment for child rapist. Hmmm...

What is the world coming to? On one end of the world, there is these two very highly reputable managers of a football club behaving like toddlers fighting over ice-cream in public. What's embarassing is that the feud between the managers of the two of the top english football clubs in England is spilling over to the whole nation and even across the globe. I'd say, put both of them in the ring and they can yank each other till kingdom come. Nothing is worse than seeing two grown men whining like school girls. Wait a minute, there is something worse...

I've just read in the news today that our great police department is going around houses to arrest 'criminals', handcuff them and put them in jail until their trial. Their crimes are apparently so heinous that the police department has to send a five man team to arrest each of these criminals. Apparently, they have recently caught one out of the 4,203 wanted fugitives in Malaysia. What crime can it be that deserve such a strong backlash from the law? Child molestation and raping? No. Snatch theft that causes serious injury and death? No. Triads who hires mental patients as assassins? No.

There's only one type of crime that is so cruel and serious that deserve to feel the full extent of the law. You've guessed it! (What do we have for him, Vanna?)

It is (drumrolls...) NOT PAYING YOUR TRAFFIC SUMMONSES! Read it again, if you must. That's right, if you don't pay your traffic summonses, you are a fugitive on the lose. Expect a five-man team to knock at your door, handcuff you and drag your sorry ass all the way to the lock-up. It doesn't matter if you are a coffee shop owner or an office worker or GRO or a VCD Peddler or a General Manager is some semi-established company. You can mess with the law but if you don't pay your traffic summonses, that is the last straw. Take my advice guys, if you have any unpaid summonses you better go and pay them now, or else our SWAT team might pay you a visit.

For those of you who would like to check if you have any summonses online here are the links:

On a lighter note, we have a new movie this summer... here's the text of the trailer:


1,273,402 summonses was issued.
And they did not pay.
RM300 million must be paid.
But they refuse to pay.
4203 arrest warrants were issued.
And they still did not pay.

This summer...
The most elite of forces take on 4,203 of the most wanted criminals,
They can run but they cannot hide.
Coming in February...

"PDRM BOLEH - You shoud've paid your summons"

More "Nutty" stories-Tickle Me Elmo

There is a factory in America which makes the Tickle Me Elmo toys. The toy "laughs" when you tickle it under the arm.

A new blonde employee is hired at the Tickle Me Elmo factory and she reports for her first day promptly at 0800.

At 0845 that day, the Foreman from the assembly line begins to complain about the new employee to the Plant Manager. He said that she is incredibly slow and the whole line is backing up, putting the entire production line behind schedule.

The Plant Manager decides he should see this for himself, so the two men march down to the factory floor. When they get there, the line is so backed up that there are Tickle Me Elmo's all over the factory floor.

At the end of the line stands the new employee surrounded by mountains of Tickle Me Elmo's. She has a roll of bright red fabric and a huge bag of small marbles. The two men watch in amazement as she cuts a little piece of fabric, wraps it around two marbles and begins to carefully sew the little package between Elmo's legs.

The Plant Manager bursts into laughter.

After several minutes of hysterics he pulls himself together and approaches the woman.

"I'm sorry," he says to her, barely able to keep a straight face, "but I think you misunderstood the instructions I gave you yesterday. Your job is to give Elmo two test tickles".My Godson is a big Fan of Elmo.. and I do hope he doesn't get one with Elmo's nuts hanging out cause that might upset kids around the world as Elmo is known to be free of nuts.Gosh!Suddenly MJ's rosary story comes to mind...guess I too am going nuts...

Hell has no fury like a woman scorned

Guys this is the real term when you say she's got you by the balls.Just reading this in the paper yesterday made me shriek and must say the ladies are getting smarter ...they know that medically it can be re-attached , so now whatever that comes off gets fed to the dog,blended or it's kept in the mouth till it's too late.Gulp!
LONDON — A jilted woman admitted ripping off her former lover's testicle with her bare hands after he refused to have sex with for more


No, this is not about another attempt from Malaysia to put our name in the Book of Records for "the most national power failures within 20 years". I wonder who they're going to pin it on though. Who knows, maybe the manufacturer of switchgear or an innocent bird which is sitting on a wire enjoying a Poo Poo or Kaka. Whatever the case may be, this bloke is not only gonna get an earful from his wife, but with the amount of criticism he's going to receive and has received, it's a matter of time when he will be the champion of this contest.

Anyway, I've just received a very interesting return mail, check this out:


Delivery Failure Report
Your document:
Re: Virtual Bartender
was not delivered to:
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Arul, maybe you might wanna change to a different webmail. Here are some reviews of some webmails for your consideration. As you know, I'm using Yahoo!Mail (UK edition - so that I can get free POP3), and it's serving me real well. Well, I'm not much a Microsoft fan, but if you ask me about hotmail, I'd like to sh*t on them for deleting all my emails and stopping my account for not using it for a period of time. Didn't have that problem with Yahoo!

Cheers :D

CNet Review on Yahoo!Mail
CNet Review on MSN Hotmail
CNet Review on GMail
Another Review on Hotmail

TV SMITH's 2cents on the Blackout

Click above for more:
"What to do if you are in a blackout area?
• Stop calling Tenaga.
• Stop calling your friends and overloading the cellular network.
• Do not leave your home or office just to add to the traffic snarl.
• Preserve your vehicle fuel as the petrol pumps nearby cannot operate unless they have a genset.
• Do not send me a mail later to ask me how you were supposed to read this when there was no electricity."

"Bedek" the thieves & pontianak with this new product

Guardian Angel bags-click to view
This item is a must for ladies in JB who've been victims of snatch thieves one too many times & also a must for Jake & Ell...people who have become statistics in one way or another.Guess the crucifix outline is to scare the "pontianak"?
Dutch designers Hein van Dam and Carolien Vlieger are behind the designs of handbags showing the outline of a gun, a crucifix or a knife. Developed in response to media reports of growing fear of crime in their home city of Rotterdam, the 'Guardian Angel' bags are being sold to women to protect them from robbers.
Their collection also includes laptop-bags with 3D patterns of milk and fruits because 'Robbers love your laptop, but they hate milk and fruits'."

goin loco doin' logo!

Originally uploaded by ellf.
just another option here for your kind review. the mood and feel is similar to the earlier option... a little power-puffy too!! still trying options with the anime, like you suggested arul. but a tad bit afraid that it may turn out a little kinky ha ha!... some sailor moon thingy or what. anyway, what do you think about this one... am trying to keep it simple so that it is easy for them to apply it to other materials. have a nice day guys.

Hello Young Men

Thanks for the fine words. I get my kristang friends to be on the look out for Arul come St Pedro!!


No not the goo goo dolls song!!I tracked back to 26th Dec 2004 and man! that feeling ...
About Seismic Monitor: "Seismic Monitor allows you to monitor global earthquakes in near real-time, visit seismic stations around the world, and search the web for earthquake or region-related information."

how about this one?

Originally uploaded by ellf.
thanks arul, for your invaluable insights. true, what you said about the other logo. am already working on some with the elements that you mentioned. should be quite exciting. anyway here's another one for your keen evaluation... let me know your thoughts. the teens seem to dig this one.

Suresh to buy "Free" mammogram device

Suresh intends to buy this device demonstrated here for 2005.Though he did not get the multiple size jig and only ordered the "more than 34D size" only as he's an expert in that area! Posted by Hello

Happy Birthday Terence!

Posted by HelloJan 10 Birthday Boy.

The youngest looking , oldest guy among us...a true Peter Pan but only in the looks department cause a 5mins chat with him and you'd know that he's way too mature than the way he looks.One of those rare fellas in their community that don't "borak" (geezz...hopefuly I don't get ambushed the next time I swing by Settlement).
Cheers to Terence, the Mr Reliable & Simple among us.....Happy Birthday TP!

World Cup Not Important To Argentina says Fan in Malaysia

Originally uploaded by ellf.
Figured since this crummy cup ain't important to Argentina any longer, we'll just hang on to it a little longer... say 5 times and maybe 5 times more.. he he. Actually wanted to point out that the hand holding the cup that year was actually Romario's. not sure coz i cant locate the other actual picture. If blown up, the ring on his finger can be seen. Kudos brazil! And really excited about the new breed of KaKa, Robinho, Adriano, Diego etc. We look forward to the Argies too. Heard their trying out for the world 'chap teh' championships. No lah, just kidding. We'll see you guys in 2006! ... just an after thought... lucky Suresh isn't chinese or else he'd pronounce Brazil as Brassiere (hint hint).... shucks.

jungle fever!!

Originally uploaded by ellf.
get your loin cloths ready and practice your chest-thumping tarzan calls. We could be heading into the forest reserve of in selayang soon. and we could visit suresh's legendary 15th mile.. where he encountered the mystical white t*t*k!!! we can take the canopy walk and go trekking as well. Arul, don't worry we will fumigate the place to ward of all the bees before we go.... otherwise there'll be another...OUR FATHER...... Did tell henry about it and we'll keep it in view. Either a kids camp that we can help out with or a camping trip for ourselves. see how it goes.


I can clearly remember the first time I heard U2’s Joshua Tree album.I was totally hooked , the guitar riffs from The Edge with Bono's lyrics made me sit up and pay attention. Songs like Pride in the name of Love…a tribute to Martin Luther King still gives me goose bumps .Chris, don’t know if you remember, but I re-call us bringing the compo to the then Malacca Hockey club field at break of dawn ..sit in the middle and listen to the album as if it was a spiritual exercise.

Then U2 entered the experimental mode where they made some sort of dance music…they lost me cause the music just did not connect lah! With their last two albums they have won me over and their latest “How to dismantle an atomic bomb” is another gem and has lots of Christian elements to it.

U2 was the IN band then, now I guess they are considered the “uncle” band, heck who cares cause we are uncles already what!

Super Doggy Selvakumar

Thanks Ell for letting us in on this great story. By the way you are not allowed to sell "kuih" as you are co-owner now(admin level already)..... by the way I will slowly include all the other guys so that this place is ours...but sorry lah..... the "teh-tarik kakis" only allowed...all equal.Posted by Hello

forget MGR, forget Rajinikanth... here's Selvakumar!!!

'Dinakaran headed for the safest place he knew, the family hut just 40m from the seashore. Sangeeta thought she would never see her eldest son again. But, the family dog, a yellow mutt named Selvakumar, saw to it that she did. While water lapped at Sangeeta's heels as she rushed up the hill, Selvakumar ducked into the hut after Dinakaran.

Nipping and nudging, he did everything in his canine power to get the boy up the hill. Dinakaran credits the dog with saving his life.'

- an excerpt from FOXNEWS.

I guess kindness towards animals never goes unpaid. Selvakumar the saviour stood up and got counted that day. This little piece of news really made my day, in a time when issues around us are filled with strife and suffering. This little dog did his part in making a difference. Just like the elephants in a sanctuary in Thailand, which lifted tourists off the ground and onto their backs as they rushed towards the hills. The waves that hit the area only got as far as where the elephants stopped. It's amazing! So, always remember when the buying stops, so does the killing. Don't kill the one that could save you someday.

p.s. Thank you arul, for letting me 'jual kuih' at the madras cafe. Keep up the thought provoking.

In Celebration Of Uncle Leslie's Birthday (2)

Posted by Hello
Uncle Leslie's Suprise Birthday Party! It was the special icing on the cake for our usual Christmas supper at Terence's place.Well it was a pleasant suprise indeed for the man with the gold heart . The rum & coke flowed as usual and the toasting never stopped.Terence made a new drink "Risky" which was a mixture of rum and whisky . Suresh took a calculated "risky" shot and from what I heard, it was not too bad. In the end , I was so tipsy from the 100 plus I drank all night , my wife had to drive the car....wait! my wife always drives the car cause I can't drive...

Happy Birthday Christopher

Posted by Hello

Happy Birthday to a guy who is much mature than his age, cause almost everyone think he's the same age as the old goats he hangs around with.Truly he sometimes come up with really deep insights.Though if put in the same room with Jake and Suresh ,will come up with the biggest nonsensical stuffs.Place him in the same room with me, we will talk about PC games as if it's an art...which in my mind is.Bottom line...."kira" you very balance lah!
A guy with a wicked sense of humour when he gave his Jaya Jusco tie as a Christmas present to someone.... that someone thinks that was not wicked sense of humour but just plain wicked.Hi!Hi!
Cheers to a guy who is passionate about life,love & God!
Happy Birthday Chris!!!

Tsunami Disaster

Banda Acheh before & after Tsunami
Each time I see the images on the TV , I can't help but realise that this could have happened to me & my loved ones. When I see the devastation and despair , this could have been Klebang beach or Port Dickson. I am sure our prayers and condolences go out to those who are hit by this tragedy but ultimately let's go a little further to put our prayers in ACTION ... any way possible.

(Learn more about this tragedy here)
Posted by Hello